NUTS NOTES: WHERE WE AT?


Well, we're about halfway through this nutty little ride, about to make our mid-season turnpike trip to the land of Dragons and cheesesteaks. As we turn the corner, I think it's an appropriate time to check in on the standings. So far this season, we've let the Captain loose on an unsuspecting Ivy League, we got drunk cheering the Pride and frightening children at Madison Square Garden, and we explored the far reaches of a magical fairytale land called Riverdale. Oh, and considering this blog is supposed to be focused on NYC hoops, we probably spent too much time talking about the Pac-10. But hey, my Cougs are kicking ass, so deal.

All along, we've had a special eye on the Iona Gaels, who up until this past Saturday were on the verge of something magical. Then they had to go and ruin it with a win over Rider. It's been bugging me ever since. See, the thing is, the Gaels could've done something special, they could've been somebody. A loser somebody yes, but still, a somebody. Now, they're just another pack of losers, a 1-win team at the bottom of a shit-ass conference. It's sad.

As far as I'm concerned, the University of North Florida is the only school left with something to prove, and that makes them our new special favorites. The Ospreys are 2-21, their only wins coming over non-Division I teams Concordia College and Skidmore, which I don't even think is a school as much as it is a nickname for that kid in the 4th grade who always crapped his pants. Unfortunately, unlike previous Google image search results for Iona (see here), when I search for "Ospreys", this is the best I can come up with:



Not hot. And terrible at basketball.

Oh well, let's check in with the rest of the Empire, shall we? Up-to-date division standings can be found on the right-hand side of the page. Here's the mid-season rundown:


For the most part, Long Island's own Hofstra Pride have battled it out with the Poughkeepsie kids from Marist College for the top of the Empire Division. The city teams really haven't been anything more than mediocre, although Fordham has shown some flashes and could challenge if they can get hot again after a tough loss to Rhode Island on Saturday. Prior to that, the Rams had won 5 in a row, beating two teams, LaSalle and St. Joe's, from the Illadelph Division. We'll be up in the Bronx next Thursday for a key game vs. UMass at Rose Hill Gym. Stay tuned.


Meanwhile, the Manhattan Jaspers have been inconsistent at best. At times, they've looked like the best in the MAAC conference, as they did when we saw them knock off Marist in Riverdale last week. And yet, despite the fact they are currently in second place and only a game out of first in the MAAC, they sit in the middle of the pack in our own Empire Division with a 12-11 record. Not impressive. As for the Empire's lone Ivy entrant, Columbia, I wanted to write them off after they lost three in a row, but then they went ahead and won two this past weekend to stay in the upper half of the Empire. Too bad there's no Ivy tournament, otherwise I'd say the Lions had a shot. Still, they're clinging to life here in Nuts land.


And then there's St. John's, a maddening team going nowhere in the Big East but hanging around the Empire. They've had some quality wins, besting both Notre Dame and Syracuse back-to-back a few weeks ago, but then they got smashed by Georgetown and Pitt. They're 13-10 and sitting in fifth place right now, just ahead of Army. That Army? Yes, that Army. The Black Knight's 13-11 record is deceiving however as almost all of their wins came out of conference. I think they played the Coast Guard 13 times before Patriot League play even started. It's understandable really, they're probably too worried about being 'surged' into Iraq by that moron in the White House to worry about some stupid basketball game.


Bringing up the tail end of the Empire are the two Brooklyn entrants, St. Francis and the LIU Blackbirds, and the boys from Staten Island, Wagner. Oh, and Iona of course. Funnily enough, of all these teams, Iona may have the best shot of actually going to the NCAA tournament. Yes, you read that right, Iona does. See, all MAAC teams make the conference tourney, meaning the Gaels are guaranteed a shot at the automatic bid. In the Northeast conference however, the bottom three teams miss out on the conference tourney, meaning LIU and St. Francis' seasons are probably already over. That said, I'll still suffer with a few dozen other fans at both a Blackbirds and Terriers game in the second half of our experiment.

And finally, as bad as these teams are, they can at least take comfort in the the fact that there may be an even worst team in the area then all of them, Iona included. The St. Peter's Peacocks from Jersey City have lost 19 of 20 games, including 15 in a row. They currently sit at the bottom of a very poor Outsiders Division here in the RBN league. They suck.

But hey, at least I get this in my Google search:



Mmmmmm, sexy. Seriously nice plumage.

Later this week, in anticipation of our Saturday tripleheader in Philly, I'll give a quick rundown of the Illadelph Division, the Nuts alternative to the famed 'Big 5'. Seriously, how 'Big' can it be if it doesn't even have a Dragon?